Collections of Dilip Prakash

Colin’s night-To All you good friends who live to drink

Posted on: April 10, 2008

To All you good friends who live to drink.

Colin came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as

he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.

He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found

a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing

white robe.

“Who the hell are you?” Demanded Colin, “and what are you doing in my

bedroom?”.

The mysterious Man answered, “This isn’t your bedroom and I’m St

Peter”.

Colin was stunned “You mean I’m dead!!! That can’t be, I have so much

to live for, I haven’t said goodbye to my family….you’ve got to send

me back straight away”.

St Peter replied “Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We

can only send you back as a dog or a hen.”

Colin was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his

house, he asked to be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was

covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground.

“This ain’t so bad” he thought until he felt this strange feeling

welling up inside him.

The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, “So you’re the new hen,

How are you enjoying your first day here?”

“It’s

not so bad” replies Colin, “but I have this strange feeling

Inside like I’m about to explode”.

“You’re ovulating” explained the rooster, “don’t tell me you’ve never

laid an egg before”. “Never” replies Colin “Well just relax and let it

happen”

And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops

out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and

his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the

first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was

overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best

thing that ever happened to him…ever!!!

The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he

felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife

shouting –

“Colin, wake up you drunken idiot, you’re sh*tting in the bed”

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