Collections of Dilip Prakash

Too good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted on: December 12, 2007

Chandrababuism

 

You have two cows in Vijayawada 

 . You hook them to internet and milk 

  them from Hyderabad .

 

Jayalalithaism

 

You have two cows. You teach them 

  to cry,”Ammaaaaaaa…”

   

and fall at your feet.

 

Karunanidhiism

 

You have two cows. You give one to your son and the other to your  

 nephew ..

 

Gandhism

 

You have two cows. But you drink  

 goat’s milk.

 

Indiraism

 

You have two bulls. You adamantly  

 consider them as cows.

 

Lalooism

 

You have two cows. You buy Rs. 900 

  Crore worth of cattlefeed for them.

 

Rajnikantism

 

You have two cows. You throw them  

 into air and catch their milk in your  

 mouth.

 

Althafism

 

You have two cows. You paint them both to get colourful milk.

 

Softwarism: (Ultimate….)

 

Client has 2 cows and u need to milk them. 

 

1 . First prepare a document when to milk them (Project kick off)

 

2 . Prepare a document how long you have to milk them (Project plan)

 

3 . Then prepare how to milk them (Design)

 

4 . Then prepare what other accessories are needed to milk them

(Framework)

 

5 . Then prepare a 2 dummy cows (sort of toy cows) and show to client

the way in which u will milk them (UI Mockups & POC)

 

6 . If client is not satisfied then redo from step 2

 

7 You actually start milking them and find that there are few problem

with accessories. (Change framework)

 

8 . Redo step 4

 

9 . At last milk them and send it to onsite. (Coding over)

 

10. Make sure that cow milks properly ( Testing)

 

11. Onsite reports that it is not milking there.

 

8. You break your head and find that onsite is trying to milk from

bulls

 

13. At last onsite milk them and send to client (Testing)

 

14. Client says the quality of milk is not good. (User Acceptance Test)

 

15. Offsite then slogs and improves the quality of milk

 

16. Now the client says that the quality is good but its milking at slow

rate (performance issue)

 

17. Again you slog and send it with good performance.

 

13. Client is happy???

 

By this time both the COWs aged and cant milk.

(The software got old and get ready for next release

repeat from step 1) !!!!!

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